How Lobster Got Fancy – one of the most remarkable rebrandings in product history

“Lobster shells about a house are looked upon as signs of poverty and degradation,” wrote John J. Rowan in 1876. Lobster was an unfamiliar, vaguely disgusting bottom feeding ocean dweller that sort of did (and does) resemble an insect, its distant relative. The very word comes from the Old English loppe, which means spider. People did eat lobster, certainly, but not happily and not, usually, openly. Through the 1940s, for instance, American customers could buy lobster meat in cans (like spam or tuna), and it was a fairly low-priced can at that. In the 19th century, when consumers could buy Boston baked beans for 53 cents a pound, canned lobster sold for just 11 cents a pound. People fed lobster to their cats.

How Lobster Got Fancy – Pacific Standard.


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THE MUSUBI MURDER August 2015 Amazon / B&N /Powell’s /Audible / iTunes

Recipe: Easy Pork Butt

Calling this a “recipe” might be a little grandiose, but it’s a great way to get a main dish going with minimal effort and maximal deliciousness.

What we call pork butt is actually the shoulder.

Know Your Pig Parts

1) Buy a pork butt. It will probably be somewhere in the 5-10 pound range. If you’re lucky enough to have locally raised pork available, go for it! If you can get a bone-in butt, you’ll get the benefit of all of that glycine, proline, and other bone-y benefits.

2) Drop the pork butt into your slow cooker.

You should have a slow cooker in your kitchen. I like the latching cover for potluck-friendly portability, and the shallow oval shape for access to the food.

3) Dump Montreal Steak Seasoning all over it.  Make sure it’s on all the surfaces.

You should always have some of this around.

4) Put the slow cooker on medium or auto and leave it to cook until it’s fork-tender, about 8 hours.

4a) Obligatory Spam reference: Leftovers can be pan-fried until crispy in the same pan as diced Spam for maximum pork-y goodness.


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Recipe: Turkey Carcass Stock

In my quest to bring you the easiest (laziest) recipes possible, I present: Thirty-Second Stock. (Thirty seconds to get started, that is. The part where you pick the meat off the carcass at the end takes significantly more time.)

Sure, you could go online and find a respectable recipe like this one, but maybe you don’t want to spend a lot of time chopping celery and quartering onions and trying to figure out where the heck you’re going to find “sprigs of thyme.”

A bonus: You’ll get a lot more meat. When the turkey cooks to the ideal temperature for eating, the legs and breast are perfectly done, but the meat nearest the bone is still tough and hard to remove. When I did this last night (of course my recipes are all kitchen-tested, you think I’m making this stuff up?) I liberated another four cups of meat (!) from our sixteen-pound turkey.

Here we go:

1) Upend the turkey carcass and stuff it into a big pot. It might stick out the top a little. Wash your hands and mash it down if you can. Otherwise, don’t worry about it. It’ll loosen up and collapse as it cooks.

Excelsteel 16 Quart Stainless Steel Stockpot With Encapsulated Base, 4.5 stars on Amazon
Something like this one.

2) Sprinkle lots of Montreal Chicken Seasoning all over the carcass.

Contains sulfiting agents, so if you're allergic, just use garlic and onion powder instead.
Contains garlic, onion, orange peel, red pepper, and a bunch of other stuff I’m glad someone else put together so I don’t have to

2a) Optional: Add turmeric for color and brain health. Throw in the giblets if you have them.

3) Fill the pot with water and cook on a low boil for at least 3 hours.

4) Wait for it to cool off so you don’t burn your hands (at least a half hour). Lift the carcass into a baking pan or a big platter, pick the meat off and save for later. Strain the broth into a container.

I like glass containers, because I don’t really trust hot liquid and plastic.

4a) Did you remember to throw in the giblets? Now you can eat them! Consuming the heart of the turkey is said to endow the eater with the bird’s legendary bravery and cunning. The liver is delicious. And if you want to do some fancy gizzard thing, more power to you.

5) Obligatory Spam mention: Serve with a side of fried Spam.


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Recipe: Bacon Coconut Spam

Inspired by Leslie at Custard and Clues, I’m going to start posting my favorite recipes. Of course, Leslie is a gourmet chef and I am a lazy (and also terrible) cook, but I do know how to make a few things, and this thing is delicious .

1) Buy Bacon Spam. Not the regular blue can kind, and absolutely not one of those awful low-sodium/chicken parts abominations. Bacon Spam in the red can.

2) Cut it into matchsticks.

3) Fry it in coconut oil on low heat until the edges are translucent

4) Bring it to a potluck and watch it disappear. Try not to eat the whole pile yourself.


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THE MUSUBI MURDER August 2015 Amazon / B&N /Powell’s /Audible / iTunes